


Erin's Diary

by GBHoltzFan



Category: Ghostbusters (2016)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-25
Updated: 2017-03-25
Packaged: 2018-10-10 13:06:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 965
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10438371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GBHoltzFan/pseuds/GBHoltzFan
Summary: Below are excerpts from Dr. Erin Gilbert's diary, pertaining to Dr. Jillian Holtzmann.





	

**July 15, 2016**

After my first full day with Abby and Holtz, I went back home humming an Elle King song, "Good Girls" and caught myself dancing while I washed off my dinner dishes. That song bounced in my head all through the evening. Somehow, Holtzmann invaded my sleep last night, as I dreamt of her twirling two lit torches. I woke up chuckling.

**July 18, 2016**

Holtz again - she's a playful imp. When she winks and smiles at me, I know it's to get a reaction. Her smile is real, warm, her eyes convey a mixture of curiosity and caring. There's an open invitation there. I blush - no one, and certainly no woman, has ever flirted with me this way. Yeah!

**August 4, 2016**

She mimes, with flourish, removing an imaginary feathered tricorn, like a female version of d'Artagnan. It's so totally gay, so totally Holtzmann. She does it for laughs, but underneath it all, isn't she some kind of modern day soft-hearted romantic musketeer? She sure has a way with women. Could she settle down with one? Would she be the faithful kind? How would it be to wake up every morning with Holtz?

**August 11, 2016**

She gets sassy. She has a knack for tempering her one-liners with kindness. Perhaps it's not a knack, perhaps she's just plain kind and in her own way, respectful, mindful of other people's feelings. She's always the first one to give me a pat on the back, wrapped in sass to keep it light. After chasing validation, kissing so many asses to get it at Columbia, it took me a while believe she's sincere. She is. 

**August 23, 2016**

Holtz has no concept of personal space. She's like a kid. She climbs on us, over us, leans on us, parks her chin on our shoulders (not Patty's 'cause she can't reach). She stretches on the couch head on my lap, feet on Patty's. She'll grab our hands, our arms, tickle us, pulls us to do whatever, hugs from all directions. Patty and Abby laugh it off. I'm not use to this - hell I don't even remember mother ever hugging me. We shake hands at Christmas. I'm getting better with it. 

**September 8, 2016**

Gotta give her that - she engineers with heart. Look at the way she designs weapons to suit each personality: Abby punches, Patty chips, I blow. The science behind each of her invention is nothing short of pure genius yet she finds a way to make it fun. She'll take the poofs and getting thrown across the lab. When it comes to us, she makes damn sure her weapons are safe and keep us as safe as can be. Fun and safe, kinda. Sure, I've had to drill in some safety protocols for the lab, officially to protect the Firehouse from her poofs. But really, it is to reduce the risks she'll hurt herself badly. I have had to pick her off the floor a few times. I've seen her in pain. It frightens me to think of life without Holtz. "Please don't take my sunshine away"

**September 21, 2016**

I had a panic attack last night. I haven't had one for years but there I was shaking, thoughts spinning, it was getting hard to breath. I let her hold me. She held me tight against her, for as long as I wanted to stay in her arms. No question, no judgment, no shame, no fear. After a while, we laid down on the couch, she held me until I went to sleep. This morning, she woke me up by kissing my forehead. She slipped a cup of coffee in my hands with a wink and a smile. I wanted to apologize. She shushed me, told me I had no cause to apologize. She hadn't pulled down her goggles yet. I could see her blue eyes, soft, caring. She bit her lower lip, turned and sauntered over to her workbench. What do I make of all of this? It's like a wave of warmth. It's way off the friendship scale. 

**October 1, 2016**

The last ghost we wrangled this afternoon vomited all over Holtz and me. We were covered in that sticky ectoplasm. We hit the shower as soon as we got at the Firehouse. The hot water tank for the individual showers is on the fritz, so we had to use the group one. Holtz got in first. I don't like showering with others, even if they're women but the stuff was getting itchy, I couldn't wait. I thought, what the hell, I'll get under the farthest one and it will be ok. I went in, started washing my hair. After rinsing, I opened my eyes to see if she was still there. She was dancing while scrubbing. Oh god. She's all woman, 100% sexy eye candy. Oh shoot! I don't know how long she let me stare at her before she asked "Hey, Gilbert, like what you see?". I was so embarrassed, I could've died. She just laughed, smiled, and exited the shower. I stayed under the water until I heard her leave the shower room. Oh fuck, I'm screwed, I'm so screwed. And tonight, the images that run through my mind got me hot and bothered. I need to take care of business…

**October 14, 2016**

Holtz asked me on a date today. It's not the first time she's asked. She was casual about it, leaving room for me to turn her down. I think she was surprised when I said yes. She asked me to confirm it was yes. When I did, she bounced over, grabbed me and swung me around. JFC, I am going on a date with Jillian Holtzmann tomorrow night and I don't feel weird about it.

**Author's Note:**

> A dear diary story. Fun. 
> 
> Hey, if you want to add entries, feel free leave them in "Comments". 
> 
> Enjoy :-)


End file.
